Loving is like planting. Why? let me tell you a story about the gardener.
The gardener started gardening with her first seed. This seed is very special because it's her first seed. So she studied how to plant this seed and all the proper care needed. She put all her efforts just to make sure the plant's condition is well.
Time passed, the seed grew into a beautiful plant and the gardener is very happy.
She said to the plant, "After several months, you'll bear a fruit. i deserve your fruit after all the care I gave you."
She waited and waited but the plant doesn't show any signs of having a fruit. At that point, she discovered that the plant is not a fruit-bearing plant and after all the efforts she gave she'll get nothing in return.
The gardener started gardening with her first seed. This seed is very special because it's her first seed. So she studied how to plant this seed and all the proper care needed. She put all her efforts just to make sure the plant's condition is well.
Time passed, the seed grew into a beautiful plant and the gardener is very happy.
She said to the plant, "After several months, you'll bear a fruit. i deserve your fruit after all the care I gave you."
She waited and waited but the plant doesn't show any signs of having a fruit. At that point, she discovered that the plant is not a fruit-bearing plant and after all the efforts she gave she'll get nothing in return.
Do you want to know who's that gardener? That's me and plant is the one whom I dedicate my blog entry entitled, LONG-TIME CRUSH; and all the care that the gardener put into the plant is LOVE.
The reason why this entry is entitled CONTINUATION, is because I just want to continue my first blog for him.
The reason why this entry is entitled CONTINUATION, is because I just want to continue my first blog for him.
It's been two months since I confessed about my feelings for him. I know he doesn't read it. Yes, I'm not asking something in return, it's okay for me if he doesn't read that but you can't blame me if I'll say I'm hurt. Of course, anybody would be hurt if all your efforts won't be considered. But despite that, I'll still dedicate this entry for him and I promise that this will be the last. I just want to express all the remaining feelings that I'm not able to express in my first entry about him.
I'm hurt, and I know all the blame should be put into me, not to him and not to anyone because I'm the one who expect. I'm the one who make myself believe that something good will happen after all my efforts. I'll admit I cried for him. Funny right? But still, you can't blame me for that, I just like or love.
My friends told me not to cry for someone who's not worth it but I can't stop myself. I loved but not loved. I promised myself many times that I'll move on but at the end of the day I still think of him. Someone also said that I shouldn't chase anyone. I'm not chasing him and will not chase him, I'm still a girl.
But now I'm really going to move-on. No more turning back. I won't betray myself anymore. Since from the start, I don't have anything to hold on I'm just fooling myself that I have. So now, I'm determined, after I realized that this feeling is just nothing. I know I can do it!